The unknown

“When you walk to the edge of all the light you have and take that first step into the darkness of the unknown, you must believe that one of two things will happen. There will be something solid for you to stand upon or you will be taught to fly.” 
― Patrick Overton, The leaning tree: [poems]

Our hearts are heavy today. We had a meeting with the team caring for Finn - including general surgery, cardiothoracic surgery, neonatology, and cardiology. This got all of us on the same page but I must say that what we were being told was not totally what we were prepared to discuss.

I know Finn is sick. I know he is critically ill. I know I can't imagine not having him here.
 What I don't know is what the future holds for him.

His little body is not ready to give up, though. He is pushing through this recent insult he has had to his lungs but so many obstacles seem to be in the way for the future. His risk of NEC (necrotizing entercolitis), his esophageal surgery.... his heart.

 I continue to think back on the past and my mind scans through all of the events that have lead up to this point. I want to smile at the experience but I also want to cry. We will come out of this stronger people - it's just going to be a long road.

As we continue down this road that continues to look more and more long, we will hope for no more complications, no more infections, and continued improvement for our sweet son.  It was another one of those days. Good news will come and we are still cautiously hopeful that little Finn will survive.